Once apon a time Under-my [Tom's brother] Thumb was walking threw Gram Central Station when he came apon a running woman. She was running, running, running, running... well you get the idea. While this author has no proof, he believes that while the woman was running, running, running, running, she was also thumbing through a magazine. All of a sudden, thummmmp! She fell, hand over foot, write into the blind man's cane, barely keeping her balance and probably fingering herself for blame. The man landed, thumb first, right in to the pillar. Just then the woman said: "you're bleeding." The man said: "You hit the nail off the thumb." His cane was also broken. He shouted: "Oh no! It's brocane." A cop asked what was broke and the man said: "You mean broken, officer. Broke is when you're out of money." The cop said: "You mean you're out of money." This embarrassing exchange went on for a few hours when finally, the man exchanged his cane for a bandage. Speaking of Band Aid, didn't that record suck? The man was thumbling for something to say when the cop said: "Let me give you a ride in my cart." The man said: "Don't put the cart before the horse." The cop said: "Don't nose your thumb at me, young man." The man was able to make it to the train. While on the train, he couldn't help singing his favorite Beatles song:

"Thumbthing in the way she moves, a tracks me like no elbow lover." When the man got off the train, he held out his thumb for a cab and said to the driver: "Hey, pull my finger." OK, that was uncalled for.